Published on 11.11.2009
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I married a military guy. Engineering Man is in the Army National Guard and was recently commissioned as an officer. I enjoy being a military wife, in the sense that I only deal with it on a monthly basis, but it almost broke me once.
Engineering Man and I had been dating about three years when he was called up to serve in Iraq. I don't think civilians realize it, but life is not the same without your spouse/significant other. I had it easy. While Engineering Man was gone I was still single, graduated from college, moved to a new town, started a new job, and lived life according to my own rules. Yes, I missed him desperately, but I did not have to contend with the issues I would have if he left now.
Now, we have a son, a baby on the way, a mortgage, two vehicles, two jobs, life insurance, home insurance, car insurance, softball teams, families, daycare, and the pure fact that he's my husband. I seriously don't know how you all do it.
But I still have the experience of having someone gone. And I don't think deployed soldiers completely understand what it's like to be on the edge of your seat every day.
Waiting for a phone call.
Waiting for an e-mail.
Waiting for the news.
Waiting for the inevitable.
I guess that was the hardest thing for me to do. To cope, I had to come to the terms that he may not return. Something died inside of me then, and I know I'll never get that innocence back. I'll constantly have the thought in my mind that one day I may have to deal with what life throws me without my other half.
In light of today, I just wanted to say thank you to all military personnel. Whether you are active duty, reserves, or national guard, we thank you for everything you've done.
And to all the families left behind, I want to thank you for letting life be interrupted so that we can have our freedom.
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